Bear Sterns HR Dept. Offers Nintendo Wii’s To Lure Job Candidates

NEW YORK, NY (PSC) – The Human Resources department of beleaguered investment bank Bear, Sterns and Co. has purchased several thousand units of Nintendo Wii gaming consoles to attract new job candidates.

Once considered one of Wall Street’s most successful firms the company has recently fallen on hard times. In March, the Federal Reserve issued a non-recourse loan of $30 billion in order to cover losses in Bear Stearns’ investments in mortgage-backed securities and exotic investment paper. Management has since focused on regaining viability by attracting top tier employees.

The current situation has made finding quality prospects so challenging for talent recruiters working internally and externally, the board approved unanimously to release funds to buy the Wii’s off popular auction site EBAY at almost triple their retail cost. Nintendo Wii is a popular device among casual gamers because of it’s unique interactive style. The move is seen by many analysts as a “last ditch” effort to save it’s reputation and plummeting stock price. A spokesmen for Bear stood by the controversial decision; “many start ups are using a similar technique successfully and we strongly believe it will add zest to a normally unremarkable work environment”. He added, “every conference and break room will be stocked with legendary franchises like Mario, Zelda, and Metroid, as well as new classic Wii Sports.” Sources speculate the company will also institute a Wii Points matching program similar to that of traditional 401K packages.

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