McCLEAN, VIRGINIA (PSC) – America’s most widely circulated newspaper, USA Today, has announced a strategic shift from a periodical predominantly focused on colorful charts to the hiring of hundreds of traditional journalists.
The “McPaper’s” publisher, Gannet Company, shocked investors with the news that many thousand of the graphic designers and chart technologists would be let go from the company in order to make room for the switch. A concerned reader of the Nation’s Newspaper, Jane Johnson, from Des Moines, Iowa, claimed she felt alienated and considered the diagrams a reliable visual element to alternative papers which cater to the educated. The CEO, Hampton Jitney, staunchly defended the move in a statement: “We are a newspaper…and although we have acted like a glorified coloring book for the past 26 years, we’re gonna start covering stories that matter to the people of this free nation as well as our shareholders”.
WASHINGTON, DC (PSC) – House of Sarcasm’s (NYSE: HOS) political entity PoliScicasm.com (PSC) received a surge in web traffic after a former low level congressional assistant endorsed and praised the site’s political coverage*.
In a message to my Facebook inbox late yesterday evening, a former high school friend who worked briefly as an assistant to a congressman in America’s capital, confirmed this is an opportune time to launch the site. The powerless flack said “it makes complete sense.” He added, “luckily for you, the country, in my opinion, is into recession. People have slowly recognized that housing is in the dumps, the war is pretty pointless, and public education is generally a joke here, etc.” His use of “etc.” at the end of the statement indicates he could have continued discussing failed policy issues but decided to continue about his day.
*We haven’t really covered anything yet because this is the second post.
OMFG, WTF is going on?
It’s hard to ignore the frustrating reality of what the United States represents in the 21st century. This site will address issues by collecting entertaining perspectives on the state of our nation with an emphasis on law and politics. TTYL!